The Time is Now

All right, America, we face the point where we have to address what's really in our hearts and take decisive action. Television, movies, video games -- from South Park to Dexter's Laboratory, Ren and Stimpy to Pinky and the Brain, Sam and Max to Night at the Museum 2 -- even Walt Disney was moved by the impulse that our pop-culture mass subconscious makes so clear. Ladies and gentlemen, I have identified the real American Dream, and I'm glad to say that it is easily within our capacities to realize if we only have the courage to act.

The time has come to replace the Lincoln Memorial statue with a giant Lincoln robot. We, as a nation, will never truly be at peace in our hearts until this comes to pass.

Update 1-17-10: I am pleased to announce that noble Americans have stepped forward to promote this worthy cause on Facebook, which...is a...type of promoting...in principle...