Prophet Guttenberg

In 1987, this scene from 'Amazon Women on the Moon' wasn't even science fiction, it was just absurdity.

We live in a parody of reality.

The Time is Now

All right, America, we face the point where we have to address what's really in our hearts and take decisive action. Television, movies, video games -- from South Park to Dexter's Laboratory, Ren and Stimpy to Pinky and the Brain, Sam and Max to Night at the Museum 2 -- even Walt Disney was moved by the impulse that our pop-culture mass subconscious makes so clear. Ladies and gentlemen, I have identified the real American Dream, and I'm glad to say that it is easily within our capacities to realize if we only have the courage to act.

The time has come to replace the Lincoln Memorial statue with a giant Lincoln robot. We, as a nation, will never truly be at peace in our hearts until this comes to pass.

Update 1-17-10: I am pleased to announce that noble Americans have stepped forward to promote this worthy cause on Facebook, which...is a...type of promoting...in principle...

Just Think of Sarah. The Rest is Easy.

Chris Sims' Invincible Super-Blog has issued the challenge, and none shall hold their head high but to answer! Hence my entry in this year's contest:

Frank Miller's All-Star Batman and Robin the Boy Wonder

in 30 Seconds!

(click T-Rex to view it because Blogger has cleverly and helpfully prevented me from just putting the goddamn thing on this page at a readable size.)

UPDATE: Well, did not win, or get an Honorable Mention, but I did get asked whether I'm dense or retarded, so that's all I could ever ask.

Getting Some Bad Ass

Frank Castle...

...finds demon-killing guns so hot, he'll even hit on a dude.

The Ghost of Henson

Okay, so, you know, I'm sitting here watching Sesame Street (ahh fuck you it's what's on the noise-box at 7:30am) and there's this bit with some characters I'm too decrepit to know --specifically, a trio of Muppet faeries.

I wasn't paying attention to much of it, but apparently the sequence involved one of the faerie boys being temporarily made a prince. At the end, he's a bit disappointed not to be the prince anymore, but the teacher faerie offers him the assurance that he'll always be the faerie formerly known as Prince.

Am...am I reading this joke wrong? Did they just totally call Prince a fairy on Sesame Street?

Beauty Thy Name is Miser

Matt sent this link to me, possibly in revenge for something: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IGhT_ylXN8s&NR=1 (video, sfw)

It's...it's just awesome. I mean in the sense of "terrible". I mean, it's just so, so awful...and yet, it was necessary that this should exist. I've already watched it like five times. It's just so charming, in the sense of having the fascination of some dark power at work.

Maybe it's those hairdos, recreating the heads of the original puppets with curious accuracy. Maybe it's the Misers' assistants, emphatically not recreating the original. Or maybe it's just that damn trombone hook. I mean, that sure is catchy.

In any case, this is totally my Christmas-spirit tap for the week.

A Little-Advertised Advantage of Digital TV

The static, man. Digital broadcasts still get interference, but not the same grainy fuzzy hissing effects that TV signals used to get. Instead, you get these trippy pixellation effects, sometimes animating along with the image in bizarre ways -- as though characters on the screen had suddenly turned into smooth-flowing blocky robots. A screwed-up signal on digital just plain looks cooler than old-fashioned static.

Plus, when the sound is affected it usually cuts in and out cleanly, without that, well, staticky sound, so you can pretend that the moments of silence are covering tirades of vicious profanity.